Notes From A Relatively Old Man, #1

Though Stone has transitioned to “Learning-From-Home”, we remain committed to ensuring that our new learning model remains as “human” and student-centered as ever — in fact, our guiding principle for Learning-From-Home is “be online exactly as much as is necessary, and absolutely no more than that.” In the spirit of remaining connected and very “Stone”, 10th Grade Dean Jay Lance is occasionally writing letters to his students which he lovingly calls, “Advice From a Relatively Old Man.”

Dear 10th Grade,

I hope you are doing well. I’ll be checking in with each of you individually as we move through this challenging time, but I will also be sharing some thoughts on things I’d like for you to think about.

One of my goals as a Dean is to get you through a turbulent time. This age--15, 16 or 17--is not really harder than any other age, but it is new. It is the age right before you are considered a grown up (18). That’s not official, of course, but it’s mostly true. One part of being grown up, one that you are certainly ready for, is to think carefully about the needs of others around you. I know you all do this, but this is a great time to act on that empathy. Ask the people around you what they need help with.

Ask — and then follow through.

Maybe you aren’t sure how to do something. My own son didn’t learn how to do laundry until he was in college. This is the time to learn a new skill. Much of what people need right now is to feel safe and to know that someone is watching out for them. It’s time for you to be the one who is watching. I had this conversation with my 10th grade son yesterday. I asked him to empty the dishwasher and he groaned — that clued me in to the fact that maybe he hadn’t thought through what was really going on right now. Warwick cancelled school, it felt a little like a bit of a vacation — we had a talk, and he began to change.

Some things you don’t even need to ask to help with. Make sure your room is clean. Put your dishes in the dishwasher. Carry your laundry to the machines and then do the laundry. Clean the bathroom you use. Fold the laundry.

Just make sure that you also ask. Think about who is in your community--the people in your house, of course, but maybe your extended family or your neighbors. You might be able to do yard work without putting yourself or them at risk.

I am dedicated to helping you however you need. I can always listen and I will continue to remind you how important you are--to me, to Stone, to your family, and to the world.

All my best.

Jay